SHANNON’S DRIVE-IN: PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE

Shannon explores the 1957 Ed Wood classic Plan 9 From Outer Space and wonders is it really the worse film ever made?

Aliens resurrect the dead to stop humanity from building a doomsday weapon.

Director: Edward D. Wood, Jr.

Writer: Edward D. Wood, Jr.

Stars: Gregory Walcott, Bela Lugosi, Vampira, Tor Johnson, Lyle Talbot

Once upon a time, way back in 1980, Plan 9 From Outer Space was dubbed the “worst film ever made” by Harry and Michael Medved in their book The Golden Turkey Awards. In 1994, Plan 9 had a surge in popularity with Tim Burton’s biopic Ed Wood, a beautiful and humorous tribute to this master of schlock. It showed off the passion that is put into movies like Plan 9, where the quality is dubious, but you just have to love the will to make a movie despite all odds.

The movie begins with our narrator played by Criswell, Wood’s psychic friend. He tells us, “We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives.” He lets us know we’re going to witness future events about to happen as the movement in his eyes show he’s definitely reading off of a cue card.

From there we’re introduced to an old man (the legendary Bela Lugosi), crowding around with other mourners at his wife’s grave. The old man’s wife (horror host Vampira) arises as a ghoul, two gravediggers are killed, the old man is hit by a car (offscreen, complete with car crash sound effects!), and hubcap flying saucers appear for the sole purpose of terrorizing America. It all moves at a good pace, even if you’re left wondering what time it is with all of the day-for-night shots.

The old man becomes a ghoul, always wandering the cemetery with his cape pulled up in front of his face. This is because the footage of the actual Lugosi was shot before his death in 1956, so for this movie, Wood used a body double in the form of his wife’s chiropractor, Tom Mason.

This nonsense goes on for quite a while and it’s no use following the plot. All you need to know is humanity is slowly destroying itself and the titular Plan 9 is the resurrection of dead bodies to…warn humanity? Show off Lugosi, Vampira, and Swedish wrestler Tor Johnson as zombies? Wander through a cardboard graveyard? Anything is possible in this world and the less you think about it, the better.

Eventually the movie comes full circle and closes with Criswell (this has to mean something, doesn’t it?).

A disclaimer: If you choose to watch Plan 9, please, for the love of God, go into it knowing how silly it is. Don’t raise the quality bar too high because you’ll end up pole-vaulting yourself into oblivion.

Overall, the movie makes no Goddamn sense. But you just can’t escape how amazingly sincere it is. Clearly, there are flaws: sooooo many day-for-night shots, cardboard sets, boom shadows, and dumb dialogue. It sometimes feels like a school play full of slapdash charm and honesty, with a filmmaker who doesn’t care if the cardboard gravestones wiggle as a cast member passes by, as long as the movie is made.

Is it the worst movie ever made? I would say no. Sure, there’s less competence here than most sci-fi releases of the 1950’s. But a lot of those movies were schlocky anyway, Plan 9 just amps its schlock way up. It’s campy entertainment, not self-conscious of its flaws at all, like a child in its bravery and authenticity. In a world where a lot of us artists suffer undeniably from that dreaded beast known as imposter syndrome, Ed Wood set out to do what a lot of us would question ourselves in doing. This is the brilliance of this movie; it sets out without a fear of failure. Over time, it became immortal, not in spite of its flaws, but because of them.

Shannon Grant is a writer, performer, adventurer, and horned cryptid living in the wilds of upstate New York. Her work can be found in many small press anthologies such as A Guide to Useless Sidekicks, Catskill Chaos, and The Lizzie Borden House Anthology. She is currently at work on a vampire novella. When not writing, she can be found haunting drive-in movie theaters, karaoke bars, and looking for ghosts in the woods.

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