Ninetoes vs Destroy All Monsters

Ninetoes embraces his inner Kaiju with Destroy All Monsters. Will he roar?

In 1999, a race of she-aliens, the Kilaaks, brainwash Earth’s monsters into attacking major cities, prompting a team of astronauts to stop the invaders while the monsters battle Ghidorah.

Directed by Ishiro Honda and Jun Fukuda

Written by Ishiro Honda and Takeshi Kimura

Starring Akira Kubo, Jun Tazaki, and Yukiko Kobayashi

Hey there, movie lovers! It is your old pal, Ninetoes, coming to you from Ninetoes HQ. Today, I am taking a look at Ishiro Honda’s 1968 Kaiju Classic, Destroy All Monsters. I have popcorn in my system and my thinking cap on, so let’s get to it!

This is not a monster/Kaiju movie; it is a buffet! Most of the time, you will have one or two monsters in a classic Kaiju movie. Destroy All Monsters gives us eight, count ‘em, EIGHT monsters. They are:

1)      Godzilla

2)      Mothra

3)      Rodan

4)      King Ghidorah

5)      Anguirus

6)      Gorosaurus

7)      Manda

8)      Baragon

The movie was released in 1968 and set in 1999. It is amazing what movies from that era thought 1999 would look like, only to go through it and wonder what went wrong? Shouldn’t we have way more advanced planes, tanks, etc?

The story is simple. A bunch of aliens, the Kilaaks, piss off a bunch of Earth’s monsters to force us into a deal for technological utopia. The monsters go ape-shit crazy, attack major cities around the globe, while a crack team of pilots fights to uncover the Kilaak’s lair. Earth forces gain control of Earth’s monsters, the aliens send one of theirs (King Ghidorah) that should wipe out all of Earth’s monsters, but they basically treat him like the newbie who drops the soap on the first day, we win. There are no political statements or learning lessons in this one. Just sit back, relax, take in the roars!

As I watched this movie, the thought that ran through my head was “Come for the monsters, stay for the cheese!” The special effects were a big part of that cheese sandwich, but then again, we are talking practical effects, no computer generation or AI here! You know that the monsters were either puppets or guys in monster suits having a blast destroying the sets!

This is a Japanese movie with English subtitles. It is easy to read and understand, but let’s face it, we came for the monsters, not to read a movie, and boy, did we get them!

As far as acting goes, we came for the monsters.

As far as an incredible story…monsters.

No matter what question you may ask of this movie, the answer is always going to be “WE CAME FOR THE MONSTERS!”

I will deliver this one warning: IF you have sensitive ears, you might want to lower the volume at the final battle. The roars and screeches rose in a pitch that I was afraid the neighborhood dogs would go banana-pants crazy!

This is a popcorn movie!

This is a monster/Kaiju movie!

MOST of all, this is a FUN movie!!!!!

I give this 5 cheese wheels out of 5!

Until the next time, I bid you happy viewing!

Darren “Ninetoes” Perdue is a book and media reviewer. When he is not reading, he is watching true crime shows, cooking for his family, or working on a plan for universal domination. If you see him on his porch, say hi. He does not bite…much.

PLEASE NOTE: The views and opinions of the staff of Memento Mori Ink do not necessarily represent those of Memento Mori Ink or Crystal Lake Publishing, nor do the views or opinions of Crystal Lake necessarily represent those of Memento Mori Ink or its staff. Thank you for understanding.